“No dress for you.”

Have you ever noticed that when you walk through a store with nothing particular that you need or want, you see a ZILLION things that catch your eye? But on the ONE DAY, you go shopping for something very specific in mind, ya get nuttin’ honey!

Today was that day. Next Friday evening I’m hosting a “Must Love Shoes” garden party here at my house. And I have nothing to wear. Really….I don’t. I know women say that all the time but I really have nothing…..suitable. What I normally wear when I’m out in the gardens is a pair of old silk Nike shorts my 28 year old son wore when he played middle school soccer, a stained, stretched-out tank top, and slip on leather shoes I can get in and out of quickly when I need to walk back into the house. I have nothing that says “I enjoy sipping wine with my friends in the gardens on a beautiful summer evening.”

So, today I went shopping for “the dress.”

I did everything right which should have increased the likelihood that I would be successful in my hunt for “the dress.” First, I met my friend, Dawn, for lunch. She always puts me in a good mood. It’s important to be in a good mood when you have to be successful shopping.

Second, I ate salad and drank water, reducing the chances that I’d feel full and bloated. Feeling full and bloated is the ultimate buzz-kill when you’re shopping.

Third, I went with no preconceived notion of what this dress would look like.

I failed. The Retail God is obviously a man and he is in cahoots with my husband who always says “you have an entire closet FILLED with stuff. Wear something you have.”

I learned a few things today during my unsuccessful mission.

1) I have hips. (Actually I’ve known that for quite some time!) Cute dresses in the Junior department were made for skinny young girls with no hips or women my age who say mean things like “I was so busy today, I forgot to eat.” I leave it at that.

2) Waiting until one week before an important event is just plain stupid. I just can’t handle the pressure.

3) Waiting till the end of the summer season thinking you get something cute PLUS a good deal, is also stupid. You either get cute or a good deal, but never both.

4) Maybe there IS something in my closet. Guess I’ll have to go shopping in there this coming week.

My husband will be happy.

I hate it when he’s right.

ps – If you did not see the invitation to the event and would like to attend, check out the current events section of the “Must Love Shoes” website for details and contact information to RSVP.